Being okay with failure
I used to be someone who was always willing to try something new, I loved learning, and I loved just doing shit. I always thought that life was short, so I had to try everything.
In the past few years, I've become so cautious about everything, I have become more afraid. I've been putting off stuff that I always wanted to do, hobbies I've always wanted to get into. But idk for some reason things become so scary, I'm scared I might embarrass myself and look stupid. And I think the thing that I'm scared of the most is failing. The idea of putting all time, effort, and resources just for something to fail feels so scary to me.
Two weeks ago, I planted pea microgreens. The last time I planted them, it just worked. I made great salads with them and got 2–3 harvests from em. This time, it didn't quite work as well. They got stinky, and I had to throw them away. So I tried again. I soaked the peas again, and again it didn't work. So I tried to do something different. I tried not covering them and tried a different variety, tried doing it with chickpeas, washed everything carefully, made sure they were soaked, and after a few days, they just spoiled again, but it did have tiny sprouts, but I didn't want to risk it, so I threw them away again. I made sure I did everything exactly, proper ventilation and everything. In the end, they just didn't grow.
I came to the conclusion that it might just be too hot for this season for me to be growing pea microgreens. Maybe there are things that I could've done more, but I didn't beat myself too much about it this time.
“Not everything is a lesson, Ryan. Sometimes you just fail.” — Dwight Schrute
I thought about that quote hard, maybe sometimes you just fail, and that's okay. Now I'll be trying a lot more stuff that I haven't yet, and if it fails, eh, I don't think I'll be beating myself too much about it.
How about you?
-A